Boat Parade

I’m having a second cup of coffee today.  Don’t judge.  I was out running in my new orthopedic running shoes today.  I don’t know.  It is still sore.  I don’t know if I expected my tendon to magically heal in the new shoes or what.

Okay, so how cute is Queen Elizabeth on the weekend of her monarchical jubilee?  Pretty cute.  Here’s the thing that’s cracking me up, though, and I’m pretty sure it’s only funny to me.

So the big highlight of this weekend’s festivities is that the Queen is going to float down the Thames in a boat parade on Sunday.  The reason I find this funny is because a boat parade is one of the highlights of my small town’s summer festival.  Our boat parade is at night, so all the units are lighted.  When I say “units”  I mean pontoons that local businesses have decorated with float paper and Christmas lights and a giant spotlight or two run by a generator you can hear all the way on shore.  Usually our parade has a theme like “Our Festival Through the Years” or something, so the local banks make their pontoons look like ’57 Chevys and they blare Rock Around the Clock as they go floating past.

Also riding in our parade are all the dignitaries of the festival including the candidates running for queen and the current queen and royalty.  Now, the parade is — I am so bad at distances — 50-75 yards from shore and it’s dark and there are bugs.  When the notaries come by, you can’t always see exactly who it is.  You have to rely on the announcer to tell you.  Here is an announcer you may know:

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So I have a vision of the Queen of England riding down the Thames like this:

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I mean, I’m pretty sure that’s not the way it will be, but doesn’t that make you chuckle a little?

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