This October our little church plant is going to turn three. I’m not sure how old your church has to be before it’s not a church “plant” anymore, but our is still a baby church with growing pains, so for now we’ll keep calling it a “plant.”
I guess it was early December the year before when the church plant pastor came and asked if we would be interested in helping organize the music ministry. We were feeling restless at our big church, and we knew pretty much right away that this was what we were feeling restless for. We knew we were being “called” if you talk that way and know what I mean.
I guess it was this past December when Brent and I began to feel it was time to be called away from these duties. Now when I say “we,” I mostly mean Brent. I have long ago passed on most of my duties to others, but Brent has still spent many hours per week planning, organizing, scheduling and rehearsing. God graciously gave us both time, energy and patience until now. With much prayerful consideration, we announced we would be “retiring” from our position in July.
Yesterday was our last day, and what a mixed bag of emotion.
I’ve been sad. I’ve been glad. I’ve been angry. I’ve been angry in a way that differs from what the Bible labels “righteous anger.” I’ve been humanly angry, and it wasn’t productive or helpful. I’ve been worried.
On the one hand, I feel as though we are leaving the baby that is our music ministry on the step of the church for someone to come and find. I wonder who will come and what will become of it.
Then I remember . . . it wasn’t really our ministry at all. It was, is, and will be God’s ministry. I’ve read His book and He’s handled much trickier stuff than this. If He asked us to step away, it’s not because He wants to dash the thing to pieces, but to allow it to grow in a different way.
And probably us too.